Between 2 Gods - A Memoir of Abuse in the Mennonite Community
Between 2 Gods - A Memoir of Abuse in the Mennonite Community0 0 5 Scritto da: Trudy Harder Metzger
I hear murmurings that my father has threatened to kill us - his family. He flies into a rage, cursing disobedience, declaring damnation on the offender... He offers religion without relationship, and it seems that the church affirms this teaching....
These two Gods - the one revealed in nature, who makes beautiful things and whispers in the breeze, and the angry god who threatens, yells and abuses - collide, head on, in my mind, soul and spirit. I am confused and troubled. I pray to God. I ignore Him. I reach for Him. I shut Him out. I cry in desperation. I scream against Him, inwardly. I long to be held and loved by Him. I cringe. I fear. I flee.
And always my heart wonders: Which God is real? Which one is safe? Which one will ultimately save me? Which one will condemn?
My soul is tormented in the night, as the shadows dance on the walls of my room. I am seven. I am lost. I lie awake, afraid, wondering.... I am thirteen... the shadows still strike fear... the creaking stairs terrorize my mind... nightmares torment my sleep... I have tried the God of wrath, and He has left me condemned and lonely. I am abused, neglected and alone. I shut down... become numb and feel nothing. I am determined that I will not suffer forever...
...the God of my childhood is lost in the pain and trauma of abuse and I am left to struggle.... caught in a tug of war Between 2 Gods.
Più informazioniEditore: Untreed Reads - eLectio Publishing