The Shame Complex

Shame is a notoriously unpleasant emotion that almost all of us have experienced at least once in our lifetimes. Almost everyone knows what the feeling of shame is like. However, we are reluctant to disclose our shameful experiences. It is often mentioned that shame is a taboo subject. Ironically, we are ashamed of our shame. It seems much easier to say ‚I am angry/sad/nervous? than to say ‚I am sorry.” Rather than finding it liberating, there is an assumption that talking about shame is demeaning or a sign of weakness. Therefore, until recently, there has been a shortage of research, understanding, and knowledge about shame to the extent that shame and similar emotions, such as guilt, are used interchangeably in the literature. Since shame appears present in a wide variety of psychological disorders and is associated with mental health problems such as depression, social phobia, and eating disorders, it is necessary to extend our knowledge in this area and become well-equipped to deal with it their shame. The current shame theorists suggest shame is one of the so-called self-conscious emotions because it mainly involves evaluating the self. A scandal is believed to be an incapacitating emotion accompanied by the feeling of being small, inferior, and shrinking. The self, as a whole, is devalued and considered to be inadequate, incompetent, and worthless. Shame might also involve being exposed, condemned, and ridiculed. Unlike basic emotions, shame does not seem to have distinctive universal facial expressions. It is not experienced similarly in different cultures. Emotions such as shame, pride, guilt, embarrassment, envy, empathy, and jealousy are associated with a sense of self and self-awareness; hence, they belong to a family of self-conscious emotions. To experience shame, individuals need the ability to form self-representations, internalize external values, and compare and evaluate themselves. Therefore, guilt is not experienced in species with lower cognitiv

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