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Dear Media


"Absolutely not" to legitimately everything.....Comedian Heather McMahan creates a safe-space for us to tell-all and bitch about the rest. No topics are off-limits as we break down the everyday struggles of doing the most, and the least, at the same damn time. Come for the humor, authentic discussion or call in the Hotline or should we say "Absolutely NOT-Line" with your life complaints. We will discuss it all. It's a joyful take on life's craziest moments. 


Absolutely Not

On this episode, Heather welcomes Logan Crosby back to the podcast. They chat about their holiday traditions, how road life has been treating him, and their favorite grocery stores. They also go over what is on his vision board for the next year. Logan is one of the unreal talents that will be joining the crew on the Absolutely Knot Cruise. He will be bringing the hits, his band as well as his love of cougars to the high seas. Don’t forget to stream his new album, 2019. 

Episode Sponsors:

For original gifts that say “I get you”... Etsy has it!

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self.

Find gifts guaranteed to bring joy to every hard-to-shop-for person this season at saks.com. 

Right now, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off any order! Enjoy free shipping when you subscribe. Go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOTGIFT.

Shop SKIMS Holiday Shop at SKIMS.com. Available in styles for women, men, kids and even pets! 

Use code ABSOLUTELY15 for 15% off your first purchase at LumeDeodorant.com.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please don’t say Atlanta with Logan Crosby

On this episode, Heather welcomes feminine icon Sara Blakely to the studio. Sara is a fellow Atlanta girl who started Spanx and now has introduced Sneex to our tired ass feet. Heather has finally met a fellow manifester in Sara and they chat about the power that can have in your life. With her Spanx money, Sara chats about her first big purchase after hawking women’s undergarments for 10 hours on the department store floor. Also being a Breadwinner, she also goes into her relationship with her husband and what it was like telling him she made more money than him. 

Episode Sponsors:

AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box at DrinkAG1.com/absolutely.

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY.

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order.

Leesa is offering 25% OFF all mattress orders and TWO FREE Pillows for our listeners at Leesa.com

For original gifts that say “I get you”... Etsy has it! 

Earn points by paying rent right now when you go to joinbilt.com/absolutely. 

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Don’t Ride Home with Sara Blakely

Heather is coming to you from the studio for the Christmas Day episode! She works through her own trauma of her childhood to figure out why she is not the best premeditated gift giver. We have a lot of callers giving the holiday absolutely not’s and yes’s that all of y'all have brought to the hotline. She gives her hot take on a caller's distaste for the family's nativity retelling, how much you should spend on family gifts and what to purchase for your family members, plus everyone's favorite discussion about in-law relationships.

Episode Sponsors:

I’ve got you a special 25% off your order and free shipping for the holidays. Just head over to NoDaysWasted.COM/ABSOLUTELY and use promo code "ABSOLUTELY” at checkout.

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order.

Earn points by paying rent right now when you go to joinbilt.com/absolutely.

Right now, Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners FIFTEEN PERCENT off their 5-day nutrition program at ProlonLife.com/absolutely.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Holidays with Heather

On this episode, we welcome the New Year, as well as new followers to the pod but introducing them to one of the highest rated as well as most talked about episodes of the entire pod. Ovaries on a Plane details Heathers harrowing experience on a flight to London where she has an ovarian cist rupture.

Episode Sponsors:

Turn up the luxury when you turn in with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absonot to get free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order.

Earn points by paying rent right now when you go to joinbilt.com/absolutely.

I’ve got you a special 20% off your order and free shipping for the holidays. Just head over to NoDaysWasted.com/ABSOLUTELY and use promo code "ABSOLUTELY” at checkout.

Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at “www.YNAB.com/absolutely.”

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Returns of Ovaries on a Plane (Replay)

On this episode, Heather is back in the LA studio for the new year with her two best buds Raymond Padilla and Tina Tompkins. They talk about the Golden Globes, the holidays and something the Santa brought her.

Episode Sponsors:

If you want to give Cornbread a try, they're offering ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners 30% off your first order. Just visit cornbreadhemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use promo code ABSOLUTELY at checkout.

AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box at DrinkAG1.com/absolutely.

Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely 

Visit BetterHelp.com/ABSOLUTELY today to get 10% off your first month.

Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELY you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off their 5-day nutrition program for your post-holiday glow-up when you go to ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY 

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

New Year, New …. with Raymond Padilla and Tina Tompkins

On this episode, Heather recaps her experience in LA during the start of the wildfires. She shares harrowing tales from friends who lost so much and remembers that even during this time of chaos we can find moments of joy and heroism. Please join Heather and find ways to support those affected by the fires such as BStrong Foundation, World Central Kitchen, and the Love and Ethos Foundation.

Episode Sponsors:

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY.

Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely.

Start earning points with the Bilt Mastercard by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! 

Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90-day bottle.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Further West

On this episode, Heather chats about her amazing time in Maui and how she got to spend some quality time with her hubby. She does have some bones to pick with his fashion and beach day choices while on vacation. She is also excited to get back on the road soon with her new tour as well as the cruise. She shows off how well her new neck is healing and takes on some haters in the DM’s. She finally gets back to voicemails from you and reflects on how good of a Real Housewife she would be. 

Episode Sponsors:

Use code ABSOLUTELY15 for 15% off your first purchase at LumeDeodorant.com

Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely. 

Shop SKIMS best intimates including the Fits Everybody Collection and more at SKIMS.com and SKIMS stores.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Right now, OpenPhone is offering 20% off of your first 6 months when you go to OpenPhone.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Opposite of "Let Them"

On this episode, Heather was excited to share her vision board but mishaps with some vino leads her to verbalize it. We learn about her hopes and dreams for the upcoming year, as well as a traumatizing past job opportunity that has left a mark on how she navigates life. She goes over the newest activities happening on the Absolutely Knot cruise and gives hints as to what will happen on the Bamboozled Tour. She then takes on your voicemails!

Episode Sponsors:

Start earning points with the Bilt Mastercard by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY.

Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely.

Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle.

Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

If you’re 21+, check out viiahemp.com and use the code ABSOLUTELY to receive 15% off AND if you’re new to VIIA - get a free gift of your choice. 

Right now, our listeners get 15% off their entire order by using code at BranchBasics.com.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tornado of Chaos

On this episode, Heather is back on her power walks and trying to get her mornings off to a great start. She has her weighted vest on and is pumping up tunes from this year's Grammy winners. She was motivated by online haters on Reddit that caused her to spiral. She is excited to get back on the road and start trying out new bits which she got to test out on a secret group of corporate girlies this past week. She got a few days to sip on painkillers, listen to some steel drums and reminisce about the life of Jimmy Buffett. She takes on the voicemails of yes’s and no’s. 

Episode Sponsors: 

Right now, Not listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com and use code at checkout.

AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box. So make sure to check out DrinkAG1.com/absolutely to get this offer! 

This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self.

Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you.

Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/absolutely.

To get $100 towards your first bed purchase, go to Thuma.com/absolutely. 

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

They Not Like Us

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after an amazing time in Alabama opening up the Bamboozled Tour. She chats about the amazing audience members and how some of her controversial material played on the crowds. She brings up all of the Super Bowl drama and how we need to leave Taylor alone. She gets to voicemails and realizes we are all doing too much!!

Episode Sponsors:

Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely.

Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle.

Right now, OpenPhone is offering 20% off of your first 6 months when you go to OpenPhone.com/ABSOLUTELY

Save big during their Winter Savings event - schedule your free consultation now at Sonobello.com/absolutely.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Back to Business

On this final episode of the Absolutely Not podcast of 2021- Heather ends the year strong- on an emotional rollercoaster of barely holding her shit together. It's obvious all of the listeners are fully spiraling as well - like the High School Musical says "were all in this together". Whether you're fighting omicron or just fighting with your family, Heather takes to the Absolutely NOT line to set the record straight! 
 
 
 
Right now, Modern Fertility is offering our listeners $20 off the test when you go to ModernFertility.com/absolutely.
 
 
 
Go to getcanopy.co today and use code ABSOLUTELY10 for an extra 10% off at checkout. Your skin will thank you!
 
 
 
Produced by Dear Media. 

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hunky Dory Bat Signals

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