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Dave Stachowiak

Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners have attracted 40 million downloads and over 250K followers on Spotify and Apple Podcasts. Activate your FREE membership to access the entire leadership and management library at CoachingforLeaders.com

Coaching for Leaders

Vanessa Druskat: The Emotionally Intelligent Team
Vanessa Druskat is an associate professor at the Peter T. Paul College of Business and Economics at the University of New Hampshire. She advises leaders and teams at over a dozen Fortune 500 and Fortune Global 500 companies and wrote the best-selling Harvard Business Review article (with S. Wolff) on emotionally intelligent teams that has been chosen many times for inclusion in HBR’s most valued articles. She is the author of The Emotionally Intelligent Team: Building Collaborative Groups that Outperform the Rest (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

It’s easy to assume that a good start for a great team is getting the smartest people together. That does help, but it’s not the critical factor in whether a team performs. In this conversation, Vanessa and I discuss why the word belonging makes such a difference.
Key Points

 Raw talent of the individual and their own interpersonal skills don’t predict team performance.
 Belonging is critical for team performance. Leaders often miss this because they already feel like they belong.
 Team members understanding each other is the first and most critical norm.
 Beginning meetings with check-ins or gallery walks helps people understand each other, even if it’s not discussed extensively.
 Inviting people to bring everyday objects to illustrate a more complex point helps make understanding accessible.
 The leader sets the tone, but it’s the interaction between team members that makes the difference.

Resources Mentioned

 The Emotionally Intelligent Team: Building Collaborative Groups that Outperform the Rest (Amazon, Bookshop)* by Vanessa Druskat

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How to Engage Remote Teams, with Tsedal Neeley (episode 537)
 Team Collaboration Supports Growth Mindset, with Mary Murphy (episode 695)
 How to Help People Connect at Work, with Wes Adams (episode 735)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

753: The Key Norm of a High Performing Team, with Vanessa Druskat

Scott Keller: A CEO For All Seasons
Scott Keller is a senior partner at McKinsey, where he coleads the firm’s global CEO Excellence work within the Strategy & Corporate Finance Practice and serves as a global leader in the Organization Practice. He’s a New York Times bestselling author and trusted advisor to boards, CEOs, and senior leadership teams, with whom he guides multiyear, enterprise-wide transformations that shape the future of institutions. His colleagues and he are the authors of the new book, A CEO For All Seasons: Mastering the Cycles of Leadership (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

One of the most critical phases of taking on the top job is what you do at the start. Whether it’s stepping into the role as president, general manager, executive director, owner, or CEO, starting well can make all the difference. In this conversation, Scott and I explore how to begin in the best way possible.
Key Points

 One-third to one-half of new CEOs are considered to be failing within eighteen months of taking the role. Many wish they’d handled the transition differently.
 New CEOs enter a reality distortion field of many bosses (the board), no peers, and ultimate accountability for everything. The best CEOs guard against this by not making it about them.
 Ask questions that aren’t about you, but the organization. Instead of, “How will I know if I’m successful?” ask, “How will we know if we’re winning?”
 Beginning with a listening tour is essential. People will tell you things when you’re new that they’ll never say two or three years later.
 Create a fact-based, one version of the truth. Once you know it, keep to a single narrative for everyone.
 Err towards complete candor in the toughest realities. Prepare intensely for moments of truth, when they need to happen.
 Set clear boundaries and stay extremely disciplined. Your narrative and first moves should guide how you frame these.

Resources Mentioned

 A CEO For All Seasons: Mastering the Cycles of Leadership (Amazon, Bookshop)* by Carolyn Dewar, Scott Keller, Vikram Malhotra, and Kurt Strovink

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How Top Leaders Influence Great Teamwork, with Scott Keller (episode 585)
 How to Genuinely Show Up for Others, with Marshall Goldsmith (episode 590)
 How to Start a Big Leadership Role, with Carol Kauffman (episode 617)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

752: How to Start the Top Job, with Scott Keller

Neil Ghosh: Do More Good
Neil Ghosh is a seasoned executive whose expertise spans the nonprofit, government, philanthropic, and private sectors. With 30+ years of experience, he has successfully launched and scaled both nonprofit and for-profit ventures, building teams, business models, partnerships, and strategies to drive impact and support vulnerable populations in more than 50 countries. His book is Do More Good: Inspiring Lessons from Extraordinary People (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

There are many differences in the world today, and those differences influence leaders just like everybody else. That’s why Neil Ghosh has this invitation for us: “Never let age or ideology come between learning and growth.” In this conversation, Neil and I explore how we can lean in on great leadership through our common humanity.
Key Points

 In anyone we know, we can always find one positive attribute that we can learn from.
 Never let age or ideology come between learning and growth.
 The Dalai Lama reminds us to offer compassion and kindness, regardless of whether the recipient is in need.
 Give back without expecting fanfare. Help people get what they want through peer mentoring.
 Use your platform to promote unity and to be an advocate for others.
 Befriend people who have different views. Join or start a book club that intentionally selects books from diverse viewpoints.

Resources Mentioned

 Do More Good: Inspiring Lessons from Extraordinary People (Amazon, Bookshop)* by Neil Ghosh

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How to Connect with People Better, with Charles Duhigg (episode 670)
 Turning Down the Temperature on Outrage, with Karthik Ramanna (episode 711)
 How to Bring Out the Best in People, with Donna Hicks (episode 724)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

751: Leadership Through Our Common Humanity, with Neil Ghosh

Margaret Andrews: Manage Yourself to Lead Others
Margaret Andrews is a seasoned executive, academic leader, speaker, and instructor. Her course MYLO (Manage Yourself to Lead Others) has become the most popular professional development program at Harvard. She is the author of Manage Yourself to Lead Others: Why Great Leadership Begins with Self-Understanding (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

Virtually every book, course, and program on leadership begins with self-understanding. That’s no accident; it’s because managing ourselves helps us lead others more effectively. In this episode, Margaret and I explore the six key questions that will help you manage yourself better.
Key Points

 When people are asked to describe the attributes of their best bosses, 85% of the responses highlight interpersonal skills.
 Our differences are our features, not our flaws. Knowing yourself well helps you lead others better.

Six Questions for Self-Understanding:

 Who, and whose thinking, has shaped you as an individual?
 What situations and events have helped shape your perspective?
 What does success look like for you?
 What are your core values, and how have these values changed throughout your life?
 To what extent are you aware of—and allow yourself to feel—your emotions?
 What feedback have you received over the years about how your actions and behaviors impact others?

Resources Mentioned

 Manage Yourself to Lead Others: Why Great Leadership Begins with Self-Understanding by Margaret Andrews (Amazon, Bookshop)*

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 Enhance Your Self-Awareness, with Daniel Goleman (episode 353)
 The Way to Be More Self-Aware, with Tasha Eurich (episode 442)
 Discover Who You Are, with Hortense le Gentil (episode 459)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

750: Six Questions Every Leader Should Ask Themselves, with Margaret Andrews

Mark Crowley: The Power of Employee Well-Being
Mark Crowley is a pioneer in workplace leadership, a speaker, and the bestselling author of Lead from the Heart. He is the host of the Lead from the Heart podcast. His new book is The Power of Employee Well-Being: Move Beyond Engagement to Build Flourishing Teams (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

When I talk with leaders, many of them tell me that it’s really hard to decide on how much recognition to give people vs. constructive or critical feedback. In this conversation, Mark and I highlight the ideal ratio to calibrate our communications so that we support people’s well-being while also helping them grow.
Key Points

 Despite the focus on employee engagement, actual engagement scores are the same or worse than a decade ago.
 Post-COVID, there’s a massive move towards employee well-being. This is good for both the organization and the employee.
 An ideal positivity ratio is 4:1 in many relationships. That’s four positive interactions for every constructive or critical interaction.
 We react more strongly to negative influence than positive influence, thus the need for a ratio favoring the positive.
 Positive interactions include optimism, enthusiasm, solutions orientation, encouragement, kindness, thoughtfulness, approachability, interest, and appreciation.
 Leaders still must make unpopular decisions, set expectations, and give critical feedback. Positive interactions are in addition to these, not instead of them.

Resources Mentioned

 The Power of Employee Well-Being: Move Beyond Engagement to Build Flourishing Teams (Amazon, Bookshop)* by Mark Crowley

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How to Build Psychological Safety, with Amy Edmondson (episode 404)
 Gallup Findings on the Changing Nature of Work, with Jim Harter (episode 409)
 The Way to Notice People Better, with Zach Mercurio (episode 733)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

749: How to Balance Positive and Constructive Feedback, with Mark Crowley

Dave speaks with Tracey Gardner, an alum of the Coaching for Leaders Academy, on the critical nature of making space in order to adapt to change.

Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 12th.

Making Space to Move Forward, with Tracey Gardner

Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 12th.

In this episode, Dave shares five ways to help leaders thrive through inflection points, including:

 Redirect vs. respond
 Set team norms
 Ask a second question
 Picture tomorrow’s commitment today
 Hold a funeral

Five Ways to Thrive Through Inflection Points

Colin Fisher: The Collective Edge
Since his days as a professional jazz trumpet player, Colin Fisher has been fascinated by group dynamics. Today, he is an Associate Professor of Organizations and Innovation at University College London's School of Management, researching the hidden processes of helping groups and teams in situations requiring creativity, improvisation, and complex decision-making. He is the author of The Collective Edge: Unlocking the Secret Power of Groups (Amazon, Bookshop).

Most of us assume that the best thing we can do for our teams is to be a great coach as they’re working together. That absolutely helps, but the research says that only 10% of group effectiveness is what we do once the team is underway. In this conversation, Colin and I explore how to get a lot better at the other 90%.
Key Points

 The house always wins. If the structure isn’t right for the team to succeed, little else matters in the long run.
 Leaders tend to put a majority of their attention on coaching teams in progress instead of the more significant work at the start of structuring and launching teams.
 Work on fixing structural problems before you focus on fixing the process.
 60% of group effectiveness is determined by structure, 30% by the launch, and 10% by expert coaching.
 Critical for structure is the team goal being clear, important, and challenging. Be sure to document it.
 Negotiate roles, tasks, and jobs to support structure. Determine early how to articulate progress and highlight small wins.
 Ask yourself if the group has the right people to achieve the objective. Deep diversity that supports the goal is essential.
 Surface discussions about norms at the start, especially related to communication and storage of information.
 At a team launch, articulate why everyone is there, discuss key norms, and schedule a midpoint to reflect and align.

Resources Mentioned

 The Collective Edge: Unlocking the Secret Power of Groups (Amazon, Bookshop) by Colin Fisher

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)
 How to Generate Quick Wins, with Andy Kaufman (episode 496)
 How to Increase Team Performance Through Clarity, with David Burkus (episode 657)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

748: What Really Matters for Team Success, with Colin Fisher

Dave speaks with Elham Bidar, an alum of the Coaching for Leaders Academy, on the importance of balancing both technology and people in leadership.

Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 12th.

Embracing Both Technology and People, with Elham Bidar

Anne-Laure Le Cunff: Tiny Experiments
Anne-Laure Le Cunff is an award-winning neuroscientist, entrepreneur, and writer. She is the founder of Ness Labs and author of its widely read newsletter, a researcher at the ADHD Research Lab, and an advisor for the Applied Neuroscience Association. She is the author of Tiny Experiments: How to Live Freely in a Goal-Obsessed World*.

We all get into a rut sometimes. Once we notice we’re in one, our tendency is to work really hard to get out of it. In this conversation, Anne-Laure and I explore how starting with something tiny is often the better bet.
Key Points

 SMART goals assume we know exactly where we’re heading. Most of the time, that’s not clear.
 A tiny experiment focuses on outputs instead of outcomes.
 To build more comfort with uncertainty, find one small place to experiment.
 Our brain uses growth loops to constantly adjust our trajectory. We don’t go in circles; we grow in circles.
 Improving growth isn’t about knowledge or skill; it’s thinking about your thinking, questioning your responses, and knowing your mind.
 A simple, 5-minute tool is Plus Minus Next. It surfaces what’s working, what’s not, and your next steps.

Resources Mentioned

 Tiny Experiments: How to Live Freely in a Goal-Obsessed World* by Anne-Laure Le Cunff

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How to Become the Person You Want to Be, with James Clear (episode 376)
 How to Change Your Behavior, with BJ Fogg (episode 507)
 How to Create Space, with Juliet Funt (episode 540)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

747: How to Get Out of a Rut, with Anne-Laure Le Cunff

Why start this show?

 A bit of background about me
 How my doctoral dissertation got me thinking about the importance for leaders to focus on themselves
 One thing I've learned for sure: leaders can make a big difference in the lives of others if they take a little time to make a difference in themselves
 Why I care about this
 Lots of resources coming - articles/blogs/Q&A/guests/authors/books/my own perspective

I want your perspective as well:
To submit a comment, question or feedback, visit coachingforleaders.com/feedback

Powerful Listening

 Audio exercise - part 1
 What did you hear? It sounds a lot like a lot of our work lives.
 Audio exercise - part 2

Four Listening Levels:

 Pretend
 Partial
 Present
 Powerful

You can't listen powerfully all the time - but you need to at least some of the time.

Good listening is important work for a leader...just an important (if not more so) than "normal work"

Download the Listening Skills Assessment
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

1: Introduction to Powerful Listening

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