Summary of Pia Mellody's Facing Codependence

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#1 Those who are codependent are often in an emotional state marked by anxiety and feelings of being irrational, dysfunctional, and/or crazy. They often find themselves overreacting to everyday happenings, experiencing feelings far more excessive than appropriate for a given situation.

#2 The emotional factor of codependence can also be triggered by the disappointment of interviewing for a job and not being hired, the sadness of a good friend moving to another town, or the anger of a neighbor’s dog messing up the flower bed.

#3 The families of alcoholics and other chemically dependent people often noticed that their emotions were intensified in their relationships with the alcoholic or addict, but they were unable to express them in a healthy way because of a compulsion to please and care for the addicted person.

#4 The disease of codependence is difficult to see from the outside, as its sufferers wear a mask of adequacy and success designed to win the all-important approval of others. But these slaves of powerful, seemingly groundless compulsive feelings are doomed to be on an endless treadmill of personal failure and intensified experiences of shame, pain, fear, and repressed anger.

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