A Dumb Birds Field Guide to the Worst Birds Ever

We can all agree—birds are terrible. They're stupid and won't shut up.

Featuring fifty of the absolute worst birds to fly the earth, Kracht identifies each of their most terrible qualities, details exactly why they suck, and shows you why. Including all-new, all-worst fowl, such as: the absolute waste of feathers Cruddy Turdstone (Ruddy Turnstone), the utter a-hole Blank Staring-Eyes Flycrapper (Black Paradise Flycatcher), the outright loser Dowdy Woodfucker (Downy Woodpecker), and many more!

Even the author's previous bird takedown guides are no preparation for this hilariously harrowing collection of squawking, conceited, trash-eating, and even murderous idiots. The horror. The horror . . .

LOVE BIRDS? HATE BIRDS?: For those who hate birds and for bird lovers everywhere with a sense of humor, this handbook is equal parts profane and funny, and—let's face it—true.

ENTERTAINING AND EDUCATIONAL: This uproarious guide to all things wings includes tips for bird identification, musings on the avian population and classification, and more. Plus, each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more.

© 2025 Tantor Media (Audiobook): 9798331940140

Release date

Audiobook: 11 March 2025